A Decade Later: How One Mother Honors Her Daughter by Walking the 3-Day

Joyce Laws (center) and her family at the Susan G. Komen 3-Day in San Diego.

This year marks a decade since Joyce L.s  daughter died from breast cancer. To honor her memory, Joyce will return to the  Susan G. Komen 3-Day®, a place that holds bittersweet memories.  

“She said to me, ‘Mom, when I get through all this, let’s do this,’” Joyce recalled. “We always planned to do a 3-Day together.”

Jennifer was just 31 when she found a lump in her breast in 2009. Around the same time, she learned she was pregnant. Her doctor advised waiting a month to monitor the lump, but a second trimester biopsy confirmed Jennifer had stage 2b lobular breast cancer. She was carrying twins, but heartbreakingly, only one would survive.

Jennifer was pregnant with twins when she was diagnosed with lobular breast cancer.

Despite the devastating news, Jennifer’s resilience kept her moving forward. Doctors removed 23 lymph nodes, 22 of which were cancerous. She had a mastectomy to remove her left breast, and later had another mastectomy to remove the other breast. She also had her ovaries removed due to her estrogen-positive diagnosis. 

Through it all, Jennifer remained hopeful. She gave birth to her daughter, Maya, who was healthy and born with a full head of hair despite Jennifer undergoing chemotherapy while pregnant 

“My daughter had no hair from chemo when Maya was born, but that little girl had a head full of black hair. It just proves that the placenta takes care of the baby,” Joyce said. 

After Maya’s birth, Jennifer continued chemotherapy and was ecstatic when scans showed no evidence of cancer. Jennifer returned to work as a physical therapist, traveled to India with her husband and daughter, and continued to advocate for herself and raise awareness about breast cancer. Jennifer formed a team, Warriors for Jen, and raised money for the Komen San Diego Race for The Cure® (now the San Diego MORE THAN PINK Walk®). She organized a pizza night fundraiser and comedy event that raised over $6,000. 

“No matter how devastating what she was going through was, she was always looking on the bright side,” Joyce said. “She wanted to be out there and helping others.”

But in 2012, the cancer returned and metastasized (spread) to her spine. Jennifer refused to give up. She joined a clinical trial, kept her positive attitude, and enjoyed watching her little girl swim and ride her bike.  

Jennifer and her daughter, Maya, swimming.

When Jennifer’s breast cancer progressed and she couldn’t walk the 3-Day, she still wanted to show up to offer her support. One of her friends walked the 3-Day and Jennifer made sure she was at the finish line to congratulate her. That inspired Joyce to take the first steps they’d planned to walk together. 

 “Things appeared to be a little shaky, so I decided to do it myself. I signed up as a single walker but ended up joining the Powered by Optimism team. They embodied everything Jennifer stood for,” Joyce said. “I am still on that team to this day.” 

Joyce has walked in 13 events across San Diego, Boston, Chicago and Denver. She carried the “Daughter” flag in her first 3-Day walk in 2014 with Jennifer watching nearby. A few weeks after Jennifer passed away in October 2015, Joyce completed the 3-Day in San Diego.  

“That was the hardest walk. But the Pink Bubble community has been part of my healing process,” Joyce said. “They’ve really been there for me.” 

Now 71, Joyce continues to walk in the San Diego 3-Day and hopes to inspire the next generation to join her. Walking alongside Joyce are her son and niece, other family members, friends and her granddaughter, Maya, who is almost 16.  

Maya, who has served on the Youth Corps three times, will walk her first 3-Day this year. 

“I know Jennifer would be standing on the sidelines cheering for us all, especially Maya. She would be so happy to see her daughter at the 3-Day,” Joyce said.  

Joyce and her granddaughter, Maya, at the Susan G. Komen 3-Day in San Diego.

In honor of Jennifer’s 10-year anniversary, Joyce is setting her fundraising goal at $10,000 – the same amount Jennifer challenged her to raise in 2015.  

“I told her that was a lot, but she said, ‘You can do it mom.’” Joyce recalled. “And that year I did. I managed to raise over $10,000. So, this year, I’m doing it again, for her.” 

 

 

July Pink Bubble Story of the Month: Beth B. 

Beth B.: My Story— 4 Words Plus 1  

“A lot can happen in three days” has been running on a continuous loop through my head over this past week. May 12th was my first Mother’s Day without my mom. May 13th was the day phase 2 of treatment began. May 14th was the one-year anniversary of John’s death. It was an incredibly difficult three days for me, exacerbated by radiation burns in my throat which have made it very difficult to swallow and to eat. Thankfully, that has started to ease. 

I never wanted to become the story, but when I was originally diagnosed in 2011, I let myself become the story. I thought it was a way to show people what it’s like to have cancer, to live with cancer, and to live beyond a cancer diagnosis. It also lit a fire in me; a fire to fight, survive, and pay it forward. Every. Single. Day. Publicly sharing your story is daunting for many people [but] it is empowering for me. It puts cancer in its place. Everyone [with cancer] has a story [and] if telling my story helps just one person, then it’s worth it. It is all worth it. To anyone facing a cancer diagnosis, tell your story; tell one person, tell a friend, a stranger, tell me, tell ten people, tell 10,000 people… just tell it. Telling your story prevents cancer from being something sacred or secret and puts the power back in your hands. It also introduces you to all us survivors and thrivers. We are here and we can’t wait to meet you.   

My original story began on November 4th, 2011, with 4 words, “You have breast cancer.” 

“You have a lump.” 

“We found something suspicious.” 

“You have breast cancer.” 

“Lumpectomy, mastectomy, chemo, reconstruction.” 

“You are a survivor.” 

For the last 12+ years, I have lived my life as a survivor. I went to all my follow-up appointments, followed all the rules, I walked and walked and walked, raised money for the cause, [and] lived my life out loud. But there was always a sword hanging over my head because breast cancer is never truly gone. It hides. It lurks. It may stay hidden, [or] it may burst back into sight. It is a dirty, sneaky beast. 

On April 13, 2024, my story became 4 words plus 1, “You have METASTATIC breast cancer.” 

“There is no cure.” 

“There are treatment options.” 

“There are clinical trials.” 

“I will fight this.” 

“We will fight this.” 

“I am a thriver.”  

There are an estimated 168,000 women in the US living with metastatic breast cancer (MBC) and the 5-year survival rate continues to improve, thanks to advancements in treatments that help people like me live longer, and with a better quality of life. Kisquali, the drug I started taking last week, was approved by the FDA in 2018. To anyone who questions why I walk, why I have walked since 1997, why I will always walk (including this November in San Diego), why together we have raised close to $250,000, why Susan G. Komen 3-Day® participants have raised close to $1 billion—this is why. The money we raise goes to fund research [which leads] to clinical trials [which leads] to better treatment options. While there currently is no cure for MBC, people are living longer, better lives with the current drug options.  

I’m sure you’re asking where I am now.  

On May 6th, I completed 10 rounds of radiation to shrink the tumors on my spine. Memorial Sloan Kettering completed blood work which included genetic mapping of my tumors and determined I have no genetic mutations which means I do not qualify for clinical trials. My treatment was transferred up to Albany to my original oncologist and his team. On May 13th, I began phase 2 of treatment which consists of hormone therapy shots of Fulvestrant every three weeks. My current pathology is identical to my original pathology which means this is treated as breast cancer even though it is in my spine, liver and lymph nodes. Kisquali is an oral medication that blocks certain enzymes that feed my cancer which I started this last week. I take three pills a day for 21 days then I get a week off and start all over again. This will continue for the rest of my life or until another protocol is developed. I will also get Prolia injections every three months to strengthen my bones which can be impacted by these medications. This treatment protocol will be so much easier than chemo and with far fewer appointments. 

With this diagnosis, I will continue to live my life out loud. I do this for those who don’t want to, or just can’t tell their stories. This diagnosis is so much harder, but I want and need people to know I’m here if they need me. I want people to understand what MBC is and what it means, to see us Thrivers living with this chronic, not terminal, disease; and we will NOT back down.  

Father’s Day

In recognition of Father’s Day, we asked 3-Day walker John S., who lost his daughter to breast cancer, to reflect on what being a father means to him and why he thinks supporting Susan G. Komen is so important. 

Father’s Day is a day where we as fathers celebrate those incredibly unique and precious relationships with our families and children. As a father who lost a young daughter to metastatic breast cancer, it evokes the fondest of memories, endless thoughts of what could have been while leaving a hole in your heart. No matter the age of a daughter, they are “forever your little girl.” It also demands that you ask yourself what you can do to support the fight against breast cancer and end this disease. 

Last year I participated for the first time in the Susan G. Komen 3-Day in San Diego. I initially registered in the summer of 2020, because our sweet daughter Melissa passed away from metastatic breast cancer at the age of 36 the previous year on November 21, 2019. The summer of 2020, we were in the depths of COVID and I was thinking of how I would spend the first anniversary of her passing. I heard of the San Diego 3-Day and coincidentally the Saturday of the event was the first anniversary date of her passing. Melissa had been involved in the fight against breast cancer. She was very impassioned about the cause. I thought it was the perfect way for me to be with my thoughts of her and a way to continue her legacy. The same day I signed up for the event I received a call just hours later to tell me they had to postpone the walk to 2021. As it turns out, the 2021 San Diego 3-Day Closing Ceremony was on the second anniversary of her passing.  

Initially, I wanted to walk alone with my thoughts about Melissa in the sea of walkers. As the time drew near, a colleague in California invited me to join a team and I agreed. I joined Sally’s “Hands Up for Hooters” team to walk with others. Earlier this year as part of its 2022 fundraising, this team passed the $1 million cumulative mark! It was the best decision I could have made, as I realized that no one impacted by breast cancer should make the journey alone. I was also honored to speak at the Opening Ceremony about Melissa’s passing, her fight against breast cancer, and taking “Action,” one of the four approaches of Komen. Here’s what I said:  

“Two years ago this Sunday, our sweet daughter Melissa passed away at the age of 36 of metastatic breast cancer after a four-year fight. She left behind her husband and two little girls ages 4 and 6. For years, she counseled women going through radiation treatment for breast cancer and served as both a spokesperson and fundraiser in the fight against breast cancer. I commit to do what I can to honor her legacy and continue her plea “that every woman under the age of 40, with a family history of breast cancer, be encouraged and provided an opportunity for a mammogram.” Also, to raise financial support for Susan G. Komen in finding a cure so that no parent will ever have to deliver a eulogy for a daughter dying of this disease.” 

Participating in the 3-Day event has been life changing as I am sure it has been or will be for this year’s new participants. To witness the grit and joy of the walkers including survivors, their emotional support network, and the generosity of their donors is truly inspirational. Since signing up for the San Diego 3-Day I have become moved to be more involved with Susan G. Komen by participating in the local walk, fundraising, legislative advocacy, and as a member of the Komen Leadership Council in Central Texas. 

Particularly on this Father’s Day, I am grateful as a father for the opportunity to support Susan G. Komen and the 3-Day. It not only helps to keep sweet Melissa’s legacy alive but also supports the survivors and their supporters in their journeys in finding the cures for breast cancer. With that I would like to share a short video about Melissa, being a father of a daughter passing away from breast cancer and why we walk. https://youtu.be/_fc3g0qKZCo 

I wish you and yours a Happy Father’s Day and a wonderful 3-Day experience! 

Best regards, 

John