Meet Stephen Y., our 2024 San Diego 3-Day Milestone Award Winner!
Over the past 13 years, Stephen has participated in 37 Susan G. Komen 3-Day® events, raising a lifetime total of more than $152,000 and promises to walk until we find the cures. Following his wife Karen’s breast cancer diagnosis in 2005, he began participating in the Komen 3-Day as a crew member while she walked. As her disease progressed and Karen was unable to walk, Stephen stepped into her shoes, vowing to his wife that he would never miss an event.
“Our cousin Stephen is a remarkable individual, embodying strength and resilience in the face of profound loss. He has participated in the 3-Day® since 2011 to raise funds for cancer research. He always says that he doesn’t want anyone else to suffer the pain and grief that his family did. Stephen is driven by the memory of his beloved wife, Karen, who bravely battled breast cancer. With each step, he carries her spirit, honoring her legacy and raising awareness for a cause that is deeply personal to him.
His passion is palpable, always seen with a determined smile and a heart full of purpose as he reaches out to encourage others. He connects with fellow participants, sharing stories of love and loss, creating a supportive community. Through fundraising efforts and outreach, he spreads hope and inspires others to join the fight against cancer. His journey is not just about walking; it’s a heartfelt tribute to the love he and Karen shared along with their three children. It is a testament to his commitment to make a difference in the lives of those affected by cancer. He is a beacon of hope, reminding everyone around him of the power of love and perseverance.” —Alyse, David, Shayna, Marc, Ethan, Bella & Haley
What was your inspiration to do your first Susan G. Komen 3-Day?
My wife started walking when she got cancer the first time. When she got cancer the second time and could not walk, I said, “I’ll do your walk to keep the continuity going.” So that was my first walk in 2011 to keep her legacy alive while she was back in treatment, going through chemo.
What has brought you back to the 3-Day year after year?
There are multiple reasons in addition to my wife, but, certainly, the Pink Bubble is part of what brings me back. What my family went through and lives on a day-to-day basis is really horrible, and I really feel like nobody else should have to go through this. I have the power to do something about it, or I have the power to say somebody should do something about it. So instead of saying somebody should do something about it, I get out and do what I can.
Nobody should live with this disease. It’s really horrible. And, also, what if my daughter were to get breast cancer and I wasn’t doing something about it? I can’t say I’m doing everything, because everything’s too strong of a word, but I feel like I’m doing my share, and if everybody does their share, I think we’ll get where we need to go.
What is the secret to your 3-Day fundraising success?
Ask everybody in sight. I keep little cards in my wallet because you never know who you’ll run into. You hand them a card, and they might or might not make a donation. It turns into a conversation, and I turn it around and say, hey, I’m doing this. Maybe you’d like to join me on a walk or make a donation. When you get a donation, great, when you don’t, oh, well. But, even if I don’t get a donation, I’ve done something to increase awareness.
I also sell See’s Candy and I practically fund one walk with them, so selling some kind of a product is helpful. Match partners are really helpful, and I also have some very generous donors.
What is the best advice you would give to anyone walking the 3-Day?
You have to get past your first walk to really enjoy it, because the first time out, you’re like, “What did I get myself into?” But you need to enjoy the people you’re with. It’s about sharing stories; it’s about recognizing we’re all there for a similar reason or cause. We’re all in this fight together so it’s important to listen to what everybody else has to say.
Make sure you train. I do way better when I train, and I wear sandals. It’s important to find what’s right for you. You have to walk your own walk; don’t try to walk somebody else’s walk. If you try to walk somebody else’s walk for 60 miles, you’ll be hurting.
It’s a wonderful thing when you happen to find somebody you’re very compatible with, walking speed, style, conversationally and you guys could just go on for hours. That’s a wonderful thing that happens sometimes, but you just got to do your own walk. You got to breathe.
What are the most important lessons you’ve learned on the 3-Day?
I learned that we’re not all alone out there. When you or someone you love gets cancer, you feel like you’re the only one. When disaster strikes, you always feel like you’re the only person this has ever happened to. But at the 3-Day you learn that you’re not really so alone.
What’s a fun fact about you?
When Karen and I dated I mailed her a card every single day. It didn’t start in the very beginning, but at some given point in the relationship, we lived an hour plus apart by car, so I used to just go to the store and buy a stack of thinking of you cards or something to that effect. Because the post office is closed one day a week, she might have got two some days, none some days, but the goal was for her to get one card a day. I have a box somewhere in my house of all those cards. Every day, now, I wear a bracelet that holds Karen’s ashes and a necklace that contains a piece of jewelry I bought her in the early stages of dating. The piece that belonged to her says “It’s Magic” and, when I gave it to her, I had no idea that her late father was an amateur magician, so it was extra special to her.
Also, I love to go water skiing. My family and I go to the lake one week a year and use the boat; I just think about how many smiles we get out of that one week. I also grew up sailing and I taught woodshop for years.
“From my perspective as Stephen’s coach for many years, many of us can only hope to be loved and cherished as much as Stephen loves and cherishes Karen.” —Coach Staci